TERROR FIELD, CLYDE NY

Clyde NY is a historic canal town that was a stopover on the journeys of many barge crews of the Erie Canal in the 1820's, 30's and 40's. It still has an idyllic charm that is hard to resist on a tour of small town America. The streets, homes and businesses cascade down a hill from North to South and provide great views of the flat lands below when you round the top. Nowhere in the aesthetic of this town does the madness of Terror Field appear represented.

 

Parking on the street or in the lot across from the entrance, you'll approach the Box Office which is two storefronts away from the Queue Line. It's actually a pretty big building these guys own. Most of the block, really. On the night we went, the Queue Line entertainment was a man acting as a Psychiatric patient whose pursuit of tickets could not be quelled. He took my dad's and shouted, “I FINALLY HAVE A TICKET!”

 

The queue line is covered and excellent this year, with the new and improved concessions and merchandise booth at the corner that meets with the exitway. Displays in the queue include an animated outhouse and a burlesque dressed mannequin. On the busiest nights at the busiest times, the covered queue is completely insufficient and the line covers much of the sidewalk down the block.

 

At about 7:30 when we went, the line was non-existent in front of us and steadily grew behind us. The pre-show message is a repeating video rather than a spoken script. So as to save the team member taking tickets at the entrance and ensure a more perfect delivery of the rules. Smart addition. The video cuts off and you have an ominous void before you. Get in your order and enter one of the best eighteen minutes of insanity in New York.

 

Themes are pretty distinguished here, on the first floor it's Hillbillies and the second floor is Medical/Occult. The topics are all-adult all-the-time. From incest to sodomy, there is sure to be something that entertains or grosses you out.

 

On the first floor, there are a good number of scenes, from typical house scenes to a mechanic's garage and a full restaurant kitchen. There are actors who might make comments about your butt, smack you with a dismembered member and call you a chicken shit for getting a running start from the kitchen. The only notable animatronics are here in the Hillbilly floor. The first is a Mechanic underneath a running car and the second is an inbred behemoth.

 

In the final room is a freestyle incest bonanza of two brothers who are disgusted that the other would get his girlfriend pregnant, who happens to be that brother's sister. Either you get some form of this hilarious roundabout back and forth or a thrilling splatter ending

 

As you round the corner to go up the stairs, you're heckled by the wheelchair hospital patient at the top landing. There is a doorway into the first Nurse's Station and a rather bizarre actress who pretends to be from Northern New Jersey is the first major character you see on this floor. She asks if you're here for the Colonoscopy or something else then holds out a chart and asks a few follow up questions. There is one that's a little frustrating but, I won't go into any detail.

 

The doctor in the next room is a murderous scoundrel who's looking to euthanize humans and possibly get your urine or semen sample. In successive rooms, there are actors who stick a stethoscope to your chest and shout, “You need surgery!” and another who physically Bear Hugs and drags you down the hallway to the doctor.

 

Close to the end of the floor, the walls become slats and you must deal with the shadows and an assault by pig-headed maniacs. It's like you're in the attic of the building being shuffled around like pigs in a slaughterhouse. The interceding dark maze portion between this and the finale is a great place for a scare but, none came.

 

The finale of the whole show is a cult burying “The Father”. You must bow to “The Father” in reverence or he will follow you home. We bowed and invited him into our house. You promenade through a really scenically beautiful Occult Shrine room, open a door and head down the stairs. For the second year in a row, my first exclamation was, “Wow.”.

 

Co-owner Brandon Struczyk was a great host once again and his show remains in my Top 13 of All Time despite a single hiccup. Terror Field is an eighteen minute walkthrough for the same number of dollars General Admission. There isn't a VIP Line so, be sure to get here early like we did this year or late like we did last year. It turns out to be the same great show. The actors have great stamina and imagination to keep going and going, no matter what time in the night. I would highly recommend this haunt to anyone within a four hour drive and extend to a five hour drive with multiple haunts including Joe's Fright Farm, Dark Matter Scream Works, Nightmare Manor, Demon Acres, Frightmare Farms and Grimsley's Gorge